Member Groups

[BWI Admin]

Member Groups

Here at Birchwood Isle, we use a color-coding system to give members an at-a-glance impression of each character's preferences, needs, or style. We employ a rainbow of colors (Blue to Magenta, so you might have guessed that the colors are not in the colors of a traditional prism!) to represent specific levels of disciplinary preference. The admins have employed this system for years and find it incredibly helpful in understanding each character so that we can do a quick assessment and act accordingly (even if we don't remember every last detail of the application or discipline sheet, which we should, of course, be referring to when we enter into a discipline thread!).

The following posts go into greater detail about what each color represents for each age bracket. Before we get there, though, allow us to break this down in very simple terms so that you know quickly and reliably, what each color means. All information that follows is intended to be brief, so please make sure that you read the posts that come after this one for the details!

You should be aware that it is unlikely that any individual character or inner person will fit perfectly into one of these groups or even categories! It is absolutely acceptable to choose the group that most accurately represents the way your character or inner person handles discipline and then use your signature and application to provide more details for your partner(s).

Please note that all "suggested punishments" are only suggestions and that you do not need to use them or allow them to be used on your inner kid!

• BLUE says no punishment.
  • Natural consequences and talking through them are the discipline.
• GREEN says gentle punishment.
  • Only gentle punishments like time out or grounding.
  • Suggested Punishments:
    • Loss of Privileges
    • Corner Time
    • Time Out
    • Grounding
• YELLOW says mild punishment.
  • Rare corporal punishment.
  • Suggested Punishments:
    • Everything listed under Green, plus...
    • Spanking
    • Writing Lines
  • Suggested Implements
    • Hand
• ORANGE says moderate punishment.
  • Infrequent corporal punishment.
  • Suggested Punishments:
    • Everything listed under Green and Yellow, plus...
      
    • Mouth Soaping
    • Writing Essays
    • Paddling
  • Suggested Implements:
    • Everything listed under Yellow plus...
    • Wooden Spoon
    • Wooden Hairbrush
    • Small, Lightweight Wooden Paddle
• RED says harsh punishment.
  • Frequent corporal punishment.
  • Suggested Punishments:
    • Everything listed under Green, Yellow, and Orange plus...
    • Stress Positions
    • Enemas
    • Meal Restrictions
    • Belting/Strapping
  • Suggested Implements:
    • Everything listed under Yellow and Orange plus...
    • Leather Paddle
    • Dad's Belt
    • Son's Belt
    • Razor Strop
    • Scottish Tawse¹
    • Punishment Strap
• VIOLET says very harsh punishment.
  • Very frequent corporal punishment.
  • Suggested Punishments:
    • Everything listed under Green, Yellow, Orange, and Red plus...
    • Figging
    • Caning
  • Suggested Implements:
    • Everything suggested under Green, Yellow, Orange, and Red plus...
    • Rattan/School Cane
    • Switch
• INDIGO says severe punishment.
  • Extremely frequent corporal punishment.
  • Suggested Punishments:
    • Everything listed under Green, Yellow, Orange, Red, and Violet plus...
    • Maintenance Spankings
    • Exercise Punishments
  • Suggested Implements:
    • Everything suggested under Green, Yellow, Orange, Red, and Violet...
    • Only harsher and more frequent and...
    • May require physical restraint and...
    • Punishment may require physical control of the child or adolescent and...
    • Birch
• MAGENTA says BEWARE! out of control behavior in...
  • Adults
  • Adolescents
  • Children

1. The tawse can be applied either to the hands and fingers or the buttock and thighs. It is made with a number of "fingers," usually two or three.

[BWI Admin]

Adult Member Groups

The following is a more comprehensive guide to the color coding for adult characters. We have gone to great lengths to provide details, scenarios, and specifics for each color group and we hope that you'll find these descriptions useful in selecting your adult character's color code. If you have any questions or concerns, please feel free to take out a ticket on Discord to discuss your options with us. We're happy to help you!

Note that this file contains several terms that will be easier to understand once you have read Terms to Know.

Low Colors

The term "low colors" represents adults who are unlikely to impose painful consequences on a child or adolescent as a consequence of their behavior. It encompasses Blue, Green, and Yellow Adults, who are best suited to caring for Blue, Green, Yellow, or Orange children or adolescents. "Low Color" adults are most likely to rely on natural consequences or gentle discipline, and while Yellows use corporal punishment, they use it sparingly and lightly, without the intention of leaving lasting effects on the person being punished. These three colors have been grouped together for the sake of using the same set of scenarios to help define them. You'll find the scenarios below under "Low Color Scenarios."

Blue Adults - Non-Disciplinarians

BLUE adults do not use punishment in their parenting, but instead make an intentional choice to allow natural consequences to teach the children in their care. They are not permissive. They do not shrug off poor behavior or turn a blind eye to it. They are extremely aware of the behavior of children or adolescents they care for and keep an attentive eye on the consequences of a child's behavior. While this often looks to outsiders like permissive parenting, the consequences for the child or adolescent can appear cruel. For example, a child whose hamster escapes its cage and becomes lost, or a teenager who doesn't make it to the final league game of the year because they couldn't be ready in time to leave the house. These natural consequences are considered enough of a lesson without the application of any kind of punishment.

Furthermore, BLUE adults offer verbal guidance more than they do contact comfort. Once a consequence has occurred, they use their words to explain to the child or adolescent what happened and why it happened, and that is the end of the conversation. They are unlikely to express sentiments like "I'm sorry this happened to you" and more likely to use words like "This is what happens when you don't do your homework. You brought this on yourself." Therefore, while their methods are deemed physically gentle, many children and adolescents find lessons learned at the hands of BLUE adults to be emotionally painful.

Because BLUE adults rely entirely on natural consequences and verbal reflection rather than on imposed punishments, physical comfort, or praise, they appeal to a narrower group of child or adolescent players, which may naturally limit their opportunities for engagement with other members of our community. For this reason, we encourage you to consider carefully whether you might prefer to create an adult of a higher color to maximize your access to meaningful storylines with other members. However, if you do choose to create a BLUE adult, make sure to create them thoughtfully and meaningfully and position their placement within the community somewhere that they will work broadly with children and adolescents. BLUE adults can make great teachers, for example! They'll still work with kids, but the children and adolescents they work with will benefit more from their philosophies than if they were placed as caregivers in the Orphan Village, for example.

Furthermore, you should take into consideration pairing your BLUE adult with a partner character who is a GREEN or a YELLOW, particularly if you intend for your adult to be or become a parent. This way, when natural consequences are not applicable to the child or adolescent they are parenting, there is another adult available to apply logical consequences or punishment when appropriate.

Because BLUE adults don't use punishment, we do not have suggested punishments or implements to give you. Please simply bear in mind that BLUE adults are not permissive or inattentive. They are aware of the children and adolescents in their care and keep a watchful eye on everything and will often intervene if safety is at stake.

Green Adults - Gentle Disciplinarians

GREEN adults use a combination of natural consequences, logical consequences, and gentle punishments. (Be sure to check out our Terms to Know file to better understand these terms in the context of Birchwood Isle!) Like BLUE adults, they are not permissive and are often aware of what their children are doing and where they are at all times. Natural consequences are usually their first response to poor behavior, but GREEN adults recognize that natural consequences aren't always sufficient, and in some cases may even represent a reward to the child who misbehaved. They differ in their philosophy in that they believe there are times a child needs direct guidance from an adult to help teach them how they should behave. Their response to poor behavior depends on the behavior and how often it has been repeated. They select consequences in the following order of preference: Natural Consequences -> Logical Consequences -> Gentle Punishment. Therefore, if natural consequences don't teach the intended lesson, a GREEN adult will move on to Logical Consequences, and if Logical Consequences are deemed insufficient to teach the desired lesson, then they will move on to Gentle Punishment.

GREEN adults also differ from BLUE adults in that they use positive reinforcement to build trust, gain compliance, and provide comfort. When they impose a logical consequence, for example, a GREEN adult will often provide the child or adolescent who has completed their consequence with praise and reassurance. They recognize that a "good job with that apology" goes a long way to reinforcing behavior and encouraging children and adolescents to make the right decisions on their own in the future. Moreover, many GREEN adults recognize the importance of helping children and adolescents build pride in themselves and therefore help youngsters find reasons to be proud of their own work or behavior.

One way to think of it is that GREEN adults rely as heavily on positive reinforcement as on negative reinforcement -- or maybe even more heavily on positive reinforcement! This can make them a great fit for child and adolescent characters who need to foster a sense of belonging and accomplishment. They may appeal to a wider range of child or adolescent players than BLUE adults, but adult players are reminded that many members come to Birchwood Isle to play child or adolescent characters because they want to engage with the aspects of corporal punishment this site incorporates. This may limit opportunities for engagement with other members of the community, and we therefore suggest that GREEN adults pair with Yellow or Orange adults for balance when parenting.

Suggested Punishments (only when necessary!)

• Loss of Privileges
• Brief Time Out (one minute per year of age)
• Short Corner Time
• Diaper Discipline
• Short Grounding

Yellow Adults - Mild Disciplinarians

YELLOW adults use a combination of natural consequences, logical consequences, gentle punishments, and spanking to influence the behavior of children and adolescents in their care. (You will again find it useful to use the Terms to Know file to help guide your understanding of our terms.) Most YELLOW adults don't have a lot of rules for the children and adolescents they care for, and they are willing to allow natural consequences to play out before they intervene in a given situation. They are often slow to anger and rarely choose to punish in a moment of temper. In fact, YELLOW adults are intentional about their discipline and they take their time to decide on the right course of action before choosing what to do. This sometimes results in "layered" punishments, where a child or adolescent may spend some time in the corner while a YELLOW adult decides what should happen next. Gentle punishments can, therefore, become longer when used by a YELLOW adult by comparison to a GREEN adult.

Consequences are often decided in the following order for YELLOW adults: Natural Consequences -> Logical Consequences -> Gentle or Corporal Punishment. However, gentle punishment is often a temporary measure for YELLOW adults while they decide whether or not a spanking is warranted. Most of the time, gentle punishments augment a spanking, rather than replacing it. Therefore, the child of a YELLOW adult may wait for their spanking in the corner, or they might be grounded once their spanking is over. The choice of which gentle punishment to impose often depends on the behavior that warranted the spanking.

Like GREEN adults, YELLOW adults use a lot of positive reinforcement alongside punishment and consequences. They are quick to praise good behavior, gentle in their reassurances following a spanking, and provide a lot of physical comfort in the form of hugs or pats on the back. Many YELLOW adults also use reconnection following the final end of a punishment (the end of their term of grounding or privilege loss). They favor quality time as a way to reconnect with a child or adolescent who may have felt distanced from their love and affection because of punishment, and most find this an effective way of building trust and relationships.

YELLOW adults are the lowest color that can truly function independently as a parent. Therefore, while YELLOW adults can be paired with lower or higher colors for contrast and effectiveness, a pair of YELLOW adults can serve a child or adolescent reasonably well. They make good parents, and are welcome to apply to work as caregivers at the Orphan Village, which employs mostly mid-color adults.

Suggested Punishments

• Loss of Privileges
• Brief Time Out (one minute per year of age)
• Short Corner Time
• Diaper Discipline
• Short Grounding
• Corner Time
• Grounding
• Mild Spanking
• Writing Lines

Suggested Implements

• Hand

Low Color Scenarios

Molly, Age 6

Molly finds a pair of child-safe scissors and decides to cut her own hair because she wants bangs like her favorite television character.

The Blue Adult tells Molly that she cannot go to the salon to have her hair cut by a professional and she must go to school with her hair in its current state and experience the consequences of other children teasing her. She must wait for her hair to grow out until it needs a trim before she can have it professionally cut.

The Green Adult puts Molly in a 6-minute time out, then takes her to the salon to have her hair cut properly by a professional. They scold Molly on the drive to the salon, but once her hair has been fixed, they offer her a big hug and tell her how pretty she looks with her new haircut.

The Yellow Adult puts Molly in the corner while they call the salon to make an appointment to have her hair fixed, then pauses to decide whether or not to give Molly a spanking. They decide a spanking is not necessary in this case and take away Molly's cartoon privileges and her scissors for the rest of the week. After the stylist has fixed Molly's hair, they tell her how pretty she looks. When her period of restricted privileges is over, they invite her to make cookies with them in the kitchen to reconnect.

Tyler, Age 8

Tyler sneaks into the kitchen before dinner and secretly eats most of the cookies that were cooling on the counter for dessert that evening.

The Blue Adult informs Tyler that since he ate the cookies, there will be no dessert after supper. When the time arrives, they inform the guests that there will be no dessert because Tyler ate all of the cookies. This is embarrassing for Tyler, and the adult allows him to feel that embarrassment without reassurance.

The Green Adult informs Tyler that since he ate the cookies, there will be no dessert after supper for the next week. They also tell Tyler that they expect him to tell the guests why there is no dessert after supper that night, and to apologize to them for eating all the cookies. After the guests leave, they tell Tyler what a good apology he made and offer him a big hug to let him know they aren't upset with him.

The Yellow Adult puts Tyler in the corner while they prepare a new batch of cookies. This takes quite some time, and Tyler has to stay in the corner until the cookies go into the oven. While the adult is preparing the new batch, they think about Tyler's consequences and decide that he should get a spanking for eating the cookies. While the cookies are in the oven, they take Tyler over their knee and give him eight hard smacks with their hand over the seat of his trousers. Then they tell Tyler that he has to apologize to the guests for eating the cookies so that nobody gets to have dessert. When it's over, they give Tyler a big hug, and after dinner they tell him how proud they are of him for making a good apology.

Emma, Age 10

Emma insists on taking her favorite stuffed bear camping despite repeated reminders to keep it inside the tent and dry. Instead, she leaves it outside overnight.

The Blue Adult reminded Emma once to get her bear from outside before they went to bed. When she didn't come back with the bear, they allowed the natural consequences to play out. Emma had to sleep without her bear because she was not allowed to leave the tent after everyone else had gone to bed, and now her bear is wet. It will have to go in a plastic bag on the return ride home and air dry once at home, meaning she'll lose another night with her bear.

The Green Adult reminds Emma twice to go and get her bear before bed. When she is too busy doing something else to get her bear, the adult goes to get the bear for her and packs it away where Emma can't find it. The next morning, when Emma goes to get her bear, the bear is gone. The adult offers sympathy that she seems to have lost her bear. They return home without Emma knowing that the adult has had the bear the entire time. A week later, the adult miraculously "finds" the bear and returns it to her with hugs and kisses.

The Yellow Adult gives Emma two chances to get her bear. When she does not, they make her sit on her sleeping bag for 10 minutes to think put a pause on whatever activity she was engaged in that distracted her too much to get the bear. Then they take her over their knee and give her 10 smacks with their hand on the seat of her shorts. Finally, they tell her to go and get her bear now and get ready for bed. Emma goes to get the bear.

Ryan, Age 15

Ryan decides to repair a squeaky bedroom door himself and removes the hinges without asking for help or reading the instructions.

The Blue Adult does not intervene. This was Ryan's bedroom door. He can go without it until he finds a way to put it back on its hinges.

The Green Adult helps Ryan find the instructions for how to put the door back on its hinges and praises him for his initiative in trying to do it on his own -- all while reminding him that he should have looked up the instructions or asked for help before he attempted something like this. They help him get the door back on, which takes all of an afternoon he could have spent playing with his friends, and give him a big hug when it's done, telling him again how proud they are for his making an effort.

The Yellow Adult helps Ryan put the door back on its hinges. While they help him put the door back on, they discuss the consequences of his behavior with him and decide that punishing him with a spanking would only make him not want to take initiative in the future, so they decide that a spanking isn't the best consequence for this behavior.

Hannah, Age 17

Hannah chooses to spend nearly all of her savings on an impulse purchase just days before a concert she has been looking forward to attending with friends.

The Blue Adult does not intervene. Hannah decided to spend her money instead of purchasing a ticket to the concert. The consequences have worked themselves out. Hannah stays home from the concert and sulks the entire evening. The adult reminds Hannah that this was the decision she made when she spent her money and offers no sympathy.

The Green Adult offers Hannah an advance on her allowance with a reminder that she will not receive any allowance for the next several weeks as a result of the advance. Hannah decides to stay home from the concert instead of losing future allowance, and sulks the entire evening. The adult decides that, due to the sulking and her irresponsible behavior, Hannah will accumulate allowance but not be allowed to spend it until she's saved as much money as she spent. They inform her of their decision and offer hugs and reassurance that the money will still be there. They use this as a teaching opportunity to help her learn to save her money in the future, but also praise her for saving as much as she did as an incentive to save again in the future.

The Yellow Adult decides to offer Hannah a sore bottom in exchange for them paying for their ticket. Hannah decides that she wants to go to the concert after all and that a spanking is a small price to pay to be allowed to hang out with her friends. The adult has Hannah stand in the corner for 15 minutes, then takes down her jeans and panties and spanks her bare bottom 20 times with their hand. When it's over, they offer her a hug, purchase her ticket on the internet, and remind her what a good job she did of saving her money, saying that they hope she's learned that, in the future, it's not worth spending all the money you worked so hard to save. They give her a hug and drive her to the concert with her friends. She's lost car privileges for a week to help prevent impulsive behavior.

Mid Colors

The term "Mid Colors" encompasses adults who are willing to use painful corporal punishment to correct behavior in children and adolescents. It encompasses Orange and Red Adult disciplinarians, who are best suited for caring for Yellow, Orange, Red, or Violet children and adolescents. Children and Adolescents played by members who do not want physical or corporal punishment (see our Terms to Know file for definitions of these terms) are better off avoiding Mid Color or High Color Adults. You may also notice that with the Mid Color Adults, the defining philosophies begin to blur together. This is by design. The Color System was originally intended to reflect only the severity or harshness or behavioral and disciplinary needs of the individual. Philosophy was added to Blue and Green Adults to make them more distinct and help encourage deeper characterization.

Orange Adults - Moderate Disciplinarians

ORANGE adults lean more heavily on punishment than the low color adults do. They may use a combination of logical consequences, gentle punishment, and corporal punishment to impact the behavior of children in their care. Gentle punishments enforced by ORANGE adults are longer than when imposed by low color adults, and ORANGE adults may inflict what we refer to as "invasive punishments" on the children they care for. In their case, Mouth Soaping. (The Terms to Know page defines the different types of punishments.)

In most cases, the system employed by ORANGE adults is the opposite of what you've seen for GREEN and YELLOW adults. It looks more like Corporal Punishment -> Gentle Punishment -> Logical Consequences. Their first course of action is to spank, then consider other forms of discipline or punishment to augment the lesson they are trying to teach. Often, however, an ORANGE adult will stack these consequences together, so it becomes Corporal Punishment + Gentle Punishment + Logical Consequences. If the child or adolescent has lied, used bad language, called someone a name, or tattled on another person, they may also have their mouth washed out with soap.

They are also less likely than GREEN or YELLOW adults to use positive reinforcement. The world is somewhat more black and white for the mid colors than it is for the low colors, and many ORANGE adults feel that praising children or adolescents when they are being, or have been, punished is confusing for the child. They reserve their praise for times the child or adolescent has made the right choice from the outset, in which case they are often lavish with their praise. Do not mistake this for a lack of caring or providing after care, however. While ORANGE adults are a mixture of extensive physical comfort after a spanking and expecting the child or adolescent to move on immediately after punishment, many ORANGE adults provide physical and verbal reassurance when the spanking is over.

Suggested Punishments

• Loss of Privileges
• Brief Time Out (one minute per year of age)
• Short Corner Time
• Diaper Discipline
• Short Grounding
• Corner Time
• Grounding
• Mild Spanking
• Writing Lines
• Writing Essays
• Bare-Bottom Spanking
• Paddling
• Bare-Bottom Paddling
• Mouth Soaping

Suggested Implements

• Hand
• Wooden Spoon
• Light Paddle
• Medium/Stiff Paddle
• Hairbrush

Red Adults - Harsh Disciplinarians

RED adults are quick to punish and use painful consequences almost as a given side-effect of naughty behavior. They are, for this reason, ill-suited to pairing with any low-color child or adolescent, who may find their methods too distressing. They aren't concerned with natural or logical consequences and use gentle punishments sparingly. In fact, many RED adults consider gentle punishments to be more abusive than corporal punishment! This is because their philosophy generally centers on "when it's done, it's done." They do not believe in prolonged consequences that leave the child or adolescent sitting in feelings all day long. In fact, most RED adults believe in getting consequences over with as quickly as possible and clearing the air with the child!

Unlike previous colors, RED adults do not generally have a system that helps them decide what punishment they should use. If their child disobeys them, they are very likely to spank, paddle, or belt/leather their child for their disobedience and poor behavior. Also unlike previous colors, they don't concern themselves with punishing in anger. Often, RED adults question adults who can punish their children when they aren't angry. While this is not a universal given about their color, players choosing to play children and adolescents with a RED adult should be aware of their temper and know that they are willing to say "yes, I'm mad at you!" And that might slide into "I'm disappointed in you," which for very attached children and adolescents can be even worse!

The good news is that RED adults calm down at some point! And when they do, they are often the best at verbal affection with aftercare. They're the first to say "Okay, it's over now" and "You did a good job taking your spanking like a big boy" or "It's okay to cry." Red adults, for all their flaws, are incredible, loving and affectionate parents who lean heavily on restoration of relationships when the punishment is over. They're big on reconnecting through quality time, and, even if a child or adolescent has been asked to be left alone afterward, they will continue to check in. They are also less likely than ORANGE or even YELLOW adults to accuse a child of "sulking" after a spanking. After all, they know it hurt!

Suggested Punishments

Crossed-out punishments are those a RED adult is highly unlikely to use.

• Loss of Privileges
• Brief Time Out (one minute per year of age)
• Diaper Discipline
• Short Grounding
• Corner Time
• Grounding
• Mild Spanking
• Writing Lines
• Bare-Bottom Spanking
• Paddling
• Bare-Bottom Paddling
• Mouth Soaping
• Belting/Strapping
• Bare-Bottom Belting/Strapping
• Tawse Applied to the Hands
• Loss of Meal Privileges
• Mild Enemas

Suggested Implements

• Hand
• Light Paddle
• Medium/Stiff Paddle
• Heavy Paddle
• Belt
• Razor Strop
• Leather Strap
• Scottish Tawse

Mid Color Scenarios

Chloe, Age 7

Chloe is told not to sneak food upstairs because of ants. She waits until the adults are distracted, hides crackers in her bedroom, and forgets about them until crumbs are discovered days later.

The Orange Adult discovers the crumbs and confronts Chloe first. If she lies about how the crumbs got there, the adult takes her into the bathroom and makes her open her mouth so she can hold a bar of soap in it while standing in the corner until she's ready to tell the truth about how the crumbs got there. Once Chloe is ready to tell the truth, the adult takes her across their lap right there on the lid of the toilet and spanks her over her skirt and panties with the bath brush. Then she is allowed to rinse the soap out of her mouth, rub her bottom, and clean up the crumbs that she left in her bedroom. After she's finished cleaning up the crumbs, Chloe gets another spanking, this time with her hairbrush on her bare bottom, and is required to apologize to the rest of the family for inviting ants into the home.

The Red Adult discovers the crumbs and goes to get a hairbrush. They find Chloe and deliver two rapid, hard smacks of the hairbrush to the seat of her skirt, then confront her about the crumbs. If she lies about where they come from, they take her to the bathroom and lather up a washcloth, which they use to thoroughly soap her mouth, making sure to get her tongue, teeth, and gums. Then they take her back to her bedroom and take down her panties while scolding her about the consequences of having food in her bedroom. When they're done scolding, they take her across their lap, push her skirt up, and give her a hard spanking with the hairbrush until she is crying. They continue to spank until they are sure that she is sorry for what she did, then they put the hairbrush aside and rub her back and bottom in circles while reassuring her that she is a good girl and they know she won't do anything like this again. When she's calm, they help her clean up the crumbs and take her downstairs to the kitchen for a snack.

Tyler, Age 8

Tyler sneaks into the kitchen before dinner and secretly eats most of the cookies that were cooling on the counter for dessert that evening.

The Orange Adult, upon catching Tyler with the cookies, takes him by the arm and applies three swift smacks to the seat of his shorts. They then take the wooden spoon from the counter and pull Tyler over their lap for a fast and snappy spanking with the wooden spoon over the seat of his shorts. The spanking lasts until Tyler is crying, and a little bit longer than that before the adult lets him up and sends him to the corner while they prepare a new batch of cookies and put them in the oven. Once the cookies are in the oven, the adult goes directly to where Tyler is standing in the corner and wraps him up in a big hug, letting him cry on their shoulder if he's still crying. Later, they make Tyler apologize to the guests for eating the cookies and tell them that he was punished for his behavior.

The Red Adult, upon catching Tyler with the cookies, takes him by the arm and applies three swift smacks to the seat of his shorts. They then take the wooden spoon from the counter and take Tyler between their knees while they scold him as they take his shorts and underpants down for him. They explain to him what he's about to get a spanking for, then put him across their lap for a fast and snappy spanking with the wooden spoon on his bare bottom. The spanking lasts until Tyler has been crying for a while and has finally submitted to the adult. This adult is looking for signs of remorse and acceptance of wrongdoing. When it's over, they keep him over their lap while rubbing his back and bottom in gentle circles and speaking soothing words about how it's over now and he took his spanking like a big boy (no matter how he behaved). Then they let Tyler get to his feet and fix his clothing so they can bake another batch of cookies together. They don't tell anybody that Tyler had to be punished, including his other parent.

Mason, Age 9

Mason is told to stay in the backyard while the adults prepare lunch. Instead, he quietly slips through the gate to visit a nearby friend without telling anyone where he is going.

The Orange Adult sends a sibling to go and find Mason, suspecting that he is at the neighbor's house. They keep lunch prepared but not cooked until the two children return, then tell Mason to go to the corner and push down his shorts and underpants. Once Mason is in the corner, they finish cooking lunch for themselves and their other child, then sit down to eat lunch together. When lunch is over, they tell Mason to fetch them the light weight paddle. While he gets it, they make space to take him over their lap for a hard, bare bottom spanking that leaves him sobbing. When it's done, the adult lets Mason up to his feet and has him pull up his clothing, then has him do the dishes from lunch. Mason has to wait until snack time to have something to eat since he "ran off" during the lunch hour when he was told to stay nearby.

The Red Adult panics. They stop cooking lunch and start making phone calls. When they locate Mason, they go straight to pick up the wooden hairbrush, then meet Mason on the front porch when the neighbor is bringing him home. Mason gets a flurry of hard, fast smacks with the hairbrush to the seat of his shorts and is already crying by the time his adult tells him to thank the neighbor for bringing him home. Then the adult swats him into the house with the hairbrush, straight into the living room, where they sit down on the couch, undo his shorts, and push them down along with his underpants. They put him over their knee and give him a hard spanking until he is crying with true remorse and sorrow. When he's really crying and they believe that he's sorry, the adult stops spanking Mason and begins to slowly rub his back while telling him that he needs to apologize to his sibling for delaying lunch. When their brief lecture is over, they tell him he's their good boy again and they know he's not going to make the same mistake twice. After the apology, the adult makes lunch and everybody sits down to eat.

Olivia, Age 12

Olivia deliberately blames her younger brother for knocking over an expensive lamp, allowing him to be scolded before the truth eventually comes to light.

The Orange Adult pauses scolding the younger brother for long enough to hear him out, then turns their attention to Olivia. It takes several minutes to extract the confession from her, but once they do, they let the younger brother go and take Olivia by the arm, pulling her upstairs to the bathroom. They continue to scold as they make her open her mouth to hold soap in it, telling her that she is going to apologize to her brother and she'll be doing all of his chores for a week. The adult smacks her bottom and sends her into the corner, then tells her to lower her panties and raise her skirt while she waits for her spanking. After a few minutes, they call her out of the corner and over their lap for a spanking with the bath brush that doesn't stop until she's sobbing and contrite. Only after the spanking is she allowed to remove the soap and rinse her mouth. She has to apologize to her brother within half an hour or she'll get another spanking.

The Red Adult doesn't believe Olivia's younger brother is telling the truth, and he gets a long, hard hand spanking for "lying" about breaking the lamp. The adult spanks until their hand is sore, but sees no sign of remorse from Olivia's brother, eventually leading to their anger dissolving and confusion on their part. Maybe he was telling the truth? But now that the anger has faded, they see no purpose in punishing Olivia since they "missed the opportunity" to correct the behavior. They offer the little boy comfort and hold him for a long time. It's only after he's moved on with his day that the anger resurfaces and the adult confronts Olivia about breaking the lamp. Noting that she's sheepish, they turn her over the back of the couch, raise her skirt and lower her panties, and use a leather belt to whip her bottom and thighs until she's crying and remorseful. They make her apologize to her brother and deduct the cost of the lamp from her allowance. They express disappointment in her and tell her she's going to have to re-earn trust. She is not offered reassurance or praise. Lying to get another person in trouble is a big deal.

Daniel, Age 15

Daniel borrows his parent's phone after being told not to use it and secretly deletes several text messages in an attempt to hide that he invited friends over without permission.

The Orange Adult sends the friends home and confronts Daniel about his behavior. When they're sure that they understand what happened, they send Daniel to his room for fifteen minutes. When his time is up, they take the medium-weight paddle upstairs and have Daniel lower his jeans and briefs, then bend over the back of his desk chair. They give him fifteen hard swats with the paddle until he is crying and saying that he is sorry. Daniel is then grounded for a week for inviting his friends over without permission. The adult doesn't find out about the phone. Daniel lied well enough to avoid it.

The Red Adult sends Daniel to the corner while his friends are still in the house. They tell him to lower his jeans and briefs to his knees right in front of his friends. Meanwhile, the adult lectures and scolds Daniel about having people over without getting permission first. They push until they get the truth: That Daniel used their cell phone to invite his friends over to the house without permission. Once the adult has the truth, they tell Daniel to bend over the back of the couch and use a belt to whip his bare bottom and thighs until he is crying, and then continue until they feel that he understands his mistake and regrets what he did, not just getting caught for it. When the belting is over, they send the friends away and rub Daniel's back in wide circles, leaning close to his ear to tell him he took it bravely and that there's no shame in getting a "whupping," especially if it's deserved. (If Daniel were a Red Adolescent he would also have gotten an enema for lying. The humiliation of being whipped in front of his friends replaces this.)

Hannah, Age 17

Hannah chooses to spend nearly all of her savings on an impulse purchase just days before a concert she has been looking forward to attending with friends.

The Orange Adult tells Hannah that because she spent all of her money, she cannot go to the concert. When Hannah sulks about this decision and makes her feelings known, the adult gives her one chance to adjust her attitude. If she does not adjust her attitude and stop her sulking, the adult gives her a sound paddling across their lap and over her skirt and panties until she is crying. Hannah then spends 15 minutes in the corner for a chance to adjust her attitude. She's given one more chance. If her attitude persists, the adult repeats the spanking on the bare bottom and Hannah spends the rest of the evening in her bedroom.

The Red Adult doesn't see this as a parenting matter. Because they don't understand or believe in "natural consequences," they inadvertently allow natural consequences to do their work. Hannah doesn't get to go to the concert because she spent her money. However, when Hannah develops an "attitude" because they wouldn't pay for her ticket, they look for an alternative way to have fun together and the adult brings up her mood by having her choose a movie that they can sit and watch together as a family. If, and only if, this does not improve Hannah's mood, the adult gives her a bare-bottom paddling bent over the back of a kitchen chair -- in plain view of her siblings. This is the result only if her behavior has succeeded in sufficiently upsetting the adult.

Rebecca, Age 17

Rebecca is given permission to attend a friend's birthday party on the condition that she be home by 10:00 p.m. She intentionally ignores the agreed curfew and returns nearly two hours late without contacting anyone.

The Orange Adult is waiting in the front room with the lights off when Rebecca gets home. They turn the light on just as she's heading for the stairs, letting her see that they already have the mid-weight paddle sitting in their lap waiting for her. Rebecca is told to lower her jeans and panties and stand in the corner for 15 minutes. When her time in the corner is over, the adult stands up and has her bend over the chair with her hands on the seat, then gives her 15 hard swats with the paddle all across her bare bottom. She is then sent to bed. The next morning, Rebecca learns that she has been grounded for a month and that her new curfew is 8 p.m. all seven days of the week.

The Red Adult is waiting on the porch when Rebecca arrives home. They take her immediately by her arm, turn her around, and give her a flurry of hard hand-spanks to the seat of her jeans, right in front of the friend who dropped her off. Then they march her through the front door while she rubs her bottom and pleads for clemency. Once inside, they take down Rebecca's jeans and panties for her, instead of giving her the chance to do it herself like a big girl, and tell her to bend over the back of the couch. Then they whip her bare bottom and legs with a belt until she is crying tears of remorse, but they don't stop until she is completely spent and exhausted. Once their anger and her energy have both wound down, the adult puts a hand on Rebecca's back and rubs it, telling her that they were really worried about where she was an they came very close to calling the police. They tell her she's lucky she didn't wind up with a judicial review and punishment, and that they love her. When she's ready, they give her a hug and hold her tight for a long time before sending her to bed.

High Colors

"High Colors" refers to adults who use corporal punishment to a degree that is frightening for the average child or adolescent, and that may be "out of bounds" for the average player (while also being exactly what some players want and need). Violet and Indigo adults fit into this category, with Magenta adults as an outlier that we will also discuss in this document. If you are not looking for a lot of corporal punishment, you are better off avoiding interactions with high colors, and certainly shouldn't place your inner kid in a family led by a High Color adult. You will, however, find High Colors throughout the site in different positions where your inner kid might encounter them. The key is to stay out of trouble around them and you will most likely be fine. (If you encounter any serious problems, please take out a ticket on Discord and check in with the admins, who can help you.) These colors are not intended to have a disciplinary philosophy so much as habits, though philosophy plays a part in every color.

Violet Adults - Very Harsh Disciplinarians

VIOLET adults have high exceedingly high expectations for the children and adolescents in their care. They are often very strict and have a lot of exacting rules for those in their care to follow. (For the difference between "strict" and "harsh," please see the Terms to Know.") When the children and adolescents in their care fail to meet their expectations, the consequences are painful and the painful effects often last for days (and sometimes longer). Unlike Low and Mid Colors, VIOLET adults almost never use hand spanking as corrective action and usually reach for a hairbrush or paddle first. For this reason, we do not recommend pairing low color youth with VIOLET adults.

Corporal punishment is almost always the first line of defense against poor behavior for a VIOLET adult. They are swift to act and most waste no time getting the whole story before punishment is implemented. Most youth are (rightfully) afraid of being punished by a VIOLET adult for this reason. Begging and pleading (nearly) always fall on deaf ears and it is common for Violet adults to deliver swift punishment while the child or adolescent is still standing, then move them into position for a "proper" punishment. Occasionally the whole story may come out in between, and punishment may be halted if the adult has legitimately made a mistake. Mistakes are more likely to occur with a VIOLET adult or INDIGO adult than any other color!

On the opposite side of the coin, VIOLET adults are often some of the most affectionate and loving with the youngsters they care for. Most are incredibly affectionate, free with their aftercare, and liberal with their praise. Their viewpoint is that they support their children from both ends: They provide encouragement when it is warranted, but they also provide negative consequences when their children stray off the path they've set them on. Children and adolescents can expect aftercare from a VIOLET adult and in many cases can also expect that their caregiver will ensure that there has been a period of restoration. Often, VIOLET adults spend a lot of time reconnecting with children or adolescents they have punished!

Suggested Punishments

Crossed-out punishments are those a VIOLET adult is highly unlikely to use.

• Loss of Privileges
• Brief Time Out (one minute per year of age)
• Diaper Discipline
• Short Grounding
• Corner Time
• Grounding
• Mild Spanking
• Writing Lines
• Bare-Bottom Spanking
• Paddling
• Bare-Bottom Paddling
• Mouth Soaping
• Belting/Strapping
• Bare-Bottom Belting/Strapping
• Tawse Applied to the Hands
• Loss of Meal Privileges
• Mild Enemas
• Harsh Enemas
• Switching
• Caning

Suggested Implements

• Hand
• Light Paddle
• Medium/Stiff Paddle
• Heavy Paddle
• Belt
• Razor Strop
• Leather Strap
• Scottish Tawse
• Rattan/School Cane
• Switch

Indigo Adults - Severe Disciplinarians

INDIGO adults are somewhat more difficult to explain than the previous colors because they are best described as VIOLET adults plus. They are not unique in their disciplinary style or philosophy. What makes INDIGO adults unique is their willingness to provide physical restraint to out-of-control children of adolescents (which gives them the ability to help maintain control of MAGENTA youth). These adults use violent methods to maintain control and adolescents may find themselves forcibly pinned to a wall or other object, even slammed against that object hard enough to knock the wind out of them. Punishment from an INDIGO adult is almost guaranteed to leave marks, and may involve parts of the body other colors don't punish -- such as the upper back/shoulders.

You should note, however, that INDIGO adults only use these methods when it is necessary to get control of an out of control child or adolescent (usually adolescent, but occasionally also a child). This is to stop a youth from running off, physically striking the adult, or doing something that might result in a judicial review and punishment before the police become involved and things become a lot worse for that child or adolescent. These methods are considered "preventative measures" by INDIGO adults, whose purpose is not to abuse. It should also be noted that this behavior is not considered abusive by the island's standards. One way to think of it is that INDIGO adults will go to any lengths necessary to control an out of control situation and to ensure that punishment is received. Most INDIGO adults are incredibly intentional about how they use their bodies to get control. They, themselves, are not out of control, even if the child or adolescent they are controlling is!

Because of the way they manhandle the children and adolescents in their care, INDIGO adults are often careful about how they administer discipline. Most of the time there is a cooling-off period for both the adult and the child or adolescent to get some control over their emotions and their behavior before they proceed with punishment. If both parties aren't under control, punishment won't proceed. It is also important to note that any action that takes place prior to this cool-down period is generally not considered part of the punishment. So if a INDIGO adults has to use a belt to get control of the situation, this is not considered part of the punishment. The punishment doesn't start until the child or adolescent submits to it.

Suggested Punishments

Crossed-out punishments are those a INDIGO adult is highly unlikely to use.

• Loss of Privileges
• Brief Time Out (one minute per year of age)
• Diaper Discipline
• Short Grounding
• Corner Time
• Grounding
• Mild Spanking
• Writing Lines
• Bare-Bottom Spanking
• Paddling
• Bare-Bottom Paddling
• Mouth Soaping
• Belting/Strapping
• Bare-Bottom Belting/Strapping
• Tawse Applied to the Hands
• Loss of Meal Privileges
• Mild Enemas
• Harsh Enemas
• Switching
• Caning
• Birching

Suggested Implements

• Hand
• Light Paddle
• Medium/Stiff Paddle
• Heavy Paddle
• Belt
• Razor Strop
• Leather Strap
• Scottish Tawse
• Rattan/School Cane
• Switch
• Birch

Magenta Adults - WARNING! Abusive Disciplinarians

MAGENTA adults cross all boundaries into behavior that is deemed abusive by island standards -- which, if you've read this entire file, is saying a lot. Most often on Birchwood Isle, this refers to the adoption of disciplinary policies that are harmful to the children and youth in their care.² Most often, MAGENTA adults are built to affect a particular plot or because it is something that the people whose inner kids they care for need to work through. The admins of Birchwood Isle strongly discourage the creation of MAGENTA adults without prior authorization and a plot already in place with another member of the site, as their plots can be traumatic and result in tragic outcomes, such as the removal of their children to the Orphan Village or emotional or physical harm to the children and adolescents they care for. You should also note that we are not attempting to create villains out of these characters. MAGENTA adults, when any member creates them, are meant to be whole characters with internal problems that need to be resolved with care.

Seeing as any of the above disciplinary philosophies may be harmful to inner kids who aren't prepared for them, we need to be clear that when we say MAGENTA adults are abusive and that they cause harm to the children and adolescents in their care, we do not mean this in a relative sense. For example, a RED adult may be harmful to a GREEN adolescent or even an ORANGE child, but a MAGENTA adult will be harmful even to the most hardened MAGENTA adolescent. This is because their punishments often don't stop until they have exhausted the physical capacity of the child or adolescent to take the punishment. They may revoke three meal privileges in a row, leaving a child or adolescent without food for 24 hours (or sometimes more); They may force the child or adolescent to do work punishments without having eaten during that time period; They may force the child or adolescent to run laps until they vomit. Punishments from MAGENTA adults do more than hurt the body, they exhaust it. While other colors may leave welts, bruises, or even occasional cuts depending on the implement, MAGENTA may break bones.

To date on Birchwood Isle, there have only ever been two adults we would classify as MAGENTA adults as per our current rules. You are more than welcome to make MAGENTA adolescents or MAGENTA children, but we require pre-authorization to create a MAGENTA adult!

High Color Scenarios

Lily, Age 8

Lily has repeatedly been warned not to torment her younger cousin by hiding his favorite toys. During a family gathering, she hides his stuffed rabbit again, leaving him in tears while insisting she was "only playing."

The VIOLET adult is frustrated that multiple warnings were given in the first place. As far as they're concerned, hiding her cousin's stuffed rabbit in the first place is a good reason for Lily to get a good, hard paddling. Now that it's happened multiple times, they are finished allowing other adults to manage her behavior. They take off their belt and give Lily two good, strong lashes with it, then demand that she retrieves the rabbit and gives it to her cousin, then apologizes for taking it. While she does that, the adult goes to get a sturdy paddle and when Lily is finished apologizing, they pull down her panties, turn up her skirt, and then put her over their knee in the living room (right among their company) and paddle her bare bottom until she's sobbing with remorse and crying out that she's sorry. When the paddling is over, they give Lily a quick hug but then tell her she has to stand in the corner and hold her skirt up so that "everybody can see what happens to naughty little girls who hide their cousin's toys." Once she's been in the corner for 8 minutes to serve her time, they call her out of the corner, fix her clothing for her, and let her curl up in their lap for the rest of the afternoon.

The INDIGO adult has been patient for a long time, giving Lily "enough rope to hang herself with." When the rabbit goes missing for the third time, they find the sturdy paddle and take Lily by the arm even when she resists them. They take her to the couch in the living room, pull down her panties and put her over their lap, push up her skirt, and give her a long, hard paddling on her bare bottom for teasing her cousin by taking his stuffed toy. When she's sobbing incoherently and no longer fighting, they stand her back up on her feet, fix her clothing for her, and then pull her into their lap, not for comfort, but as restraint, so that she can no longer get away from them to continue to hide the rabbit from her cousin. Real comfort doesn't come until the company has dispersed and she no longer has to be restrained from taking things that don't belong to her.

Owen, Age 10

When told to come inside after throwing rocks at the garage, Owen refuses, shouts at his caregiver, and tries to shove past them to run down the street rather than accept the consequences of his behavior.

The VIOLET adult allows Owen to go down the street and have his tantrum because they know that he'll be back before too long. Even a safe neighborhood can be scary for a 10-year-old in a fit of temper. They go into the house to pick up the stiff paddle, then wait for him on the porch, and when he comes back full of apologies, they tell him that it's too late for apologies and that he's going to get a spanking. They don't take him inside, but instead strip down his shorts and underpants right there on the front porch where his friends can watch him get his spanking, and they put him over their knee for a very firm paddling on his bare bottom. The paddling continues until Owen is sobbing and apologizing, and then goes on for a bit longer to make sure the lesson sinks in. When they stop, the adult puts Owen on his feet, tells him to grab his clothing, and sends him into the house with a final swat with the paddle to his bare bottom. Once inside, they help him upstairs and to his bedroom for a nap. Later that evening, they carve out some one-on-one time with Owen and let him choose a movie to watch while they cuddle on the couch.

The INDIGO adult goes after Owen and picks him up before he can reach the end of the next-door neighbor's hard. They hold him off his feet kicking and yelling and trying to bite them, and haul him back to their house and inside where they put him straight down in the corner to calm down. While he's calming down, they take off their belt, going slowly to make sure he hears what's happening behind him. Once the belt is off, they double it over and snap it to make it even more clear what's going to happen to him in a moment. Once he's worked out his temper and moved into the stage of dread and fear, they call him out of the corner and have him bend over the arm of the sofa for five good strokes of the belt that leave him sobbing and remorseful. When it's done, they send him back to the corner to think about his behavior for another 10 minutes. They put their belt back on, then call him out of the corner and give him a hug and a kiss, reminding him that this is not acceptable behavior and that they expect better from him.

Sophie, Age 11

After losing an argument with another child during a board game, Sophie flips the game board onto the floor, grabs the other child's shirt with both hands, and has to be physically separated before the situation gets worse.

[BWI Admin]

Adolescent Member Groups

The following is a more comprehensive guide to the color coding for adolescent characters. We have gone to great lengths to provide details, and specifics for each color group and we hope that you'll find these descriptions useful in selecting your adolescent character's color code. If you have any questions or concerns, please feel free to take out a ticket on Discord to discuss your options with us. We're happy to help you!

Note that this file contains several terms that will be easier to understand once you have read Terms to Know.

We recommend that all players with adult characters also read this file so they know how to handle each color of adolescent!

Low Colors

For Adolescents, the term "low colors" indicates that these adolescents do not require frequent discipline. They are generally well-behaved, are more comfortable following rules, and do not present a significant challenge to the adults who care for them. They learn well from natural consequences and when adult intervention is necessary, they respond to logical consequences and gentle punishments without the need for harsh correction. Most of the time they do not require corporal punishment to adjust their behavior, and most low color adolescents don't expect it, so when it happens, it will come as an unpleasant surprise.

Blue Adolescents - Extremely Low Disciplinary Needs

The first thing you should know about BLUE adolescents is that they do not respond well to corporal punishment. This does not vary based on the behavior, disciplinary preferences, or color of the adult character. In most cases, you should avoid corporal punishment with BLUE adolescents, as this color is chosen by players who do not desire spanking in their roleplay, and may in fact be averse to it. Many people who choose to assign this color to their adolescent inner children do so because they see their inner kid as real in the same context that a real-world child would be, and they do not want to experience corporal punishment in their roleplay. One way to think about this is as blue being a "control color" for adolescents and children. It means "stop! Think before you punish this adolescent!"

In correlation with their adult counterparts, BLUE adolescents respond well to natural consequences. They may not enjoy the results of their behavior, and they may even be prone to pouting or even fits of temper when they face natural consequences, but they actively learn from them without further adult intervention. For example, they understand that if they don't study for an exam, they may get a poor grade, and a poor grade may affect their overall GPA, which could impact their chances of getting into the University they want to attend. They understand that if they don't put gas in the car, the car may stop running on the side of the road. They might have to experience each of these things once to prevent them from making the same mistake twice, but BLUE adolescents rarely make the same mistake twice!

Moreover, you should think of BLUE adolescents as being generally well-behaved, eager to please, and agreeable. They don't tend to make problems, aren't disruptive in school, do their homework on time (most of the time), and respect their grownups. Many adults would consider a BLUE adolescent an unusually easy teenager or young adult to parent. However, this also comes with disadvantages. Often, adults see BLUE adolescents as not having had to overcome as much as some of the higher-color adolescents, and therefore adults may be more likely to be proud of an adolescent who has changed their behavior. For some players, this may mean starting out with a higher color and then gradually decreasing the color as behavior improves until the same adolescent is a BLUE!

BLUE adolescents are best paired with BLUE adults but may tolerate GREEN adults, as well.

Green Adolescents - Very Low Disciplinary Needs

The first thing you should know about GREEN adolescents is that a quick or excessive punishment is demeaning and demoralizing for them and they will not respond well to frequent punishment. This makes them a poor match with adults who are quick to punish, anger easily, or who aren't patient with teens and young adults who make mistakes. As with their Blue counterparts, players who choose to play GREEN adolescents may be averse to corporal punishment and preferring to avoid it. If you play an adult and wish to interact with a misbehaving GREEN adolescent, you should contact their big and make sure they are open to corporal punishment before you proceed. Generally, you can expect a poor response to corporal punishment from GREEN adolescents! In this case, GREEN definitely does not mean "go!" Pause before using corporal punishment with a GREEN adolescent!

GREEN adolescents don't always appreciate gentle punishment or logical consequences, but they do tend to respond well to them in the long run. Some may sulk when grounded, or resist having to stand in the corner like a little child, but that doesn't mean that these are not effective behavior modification tools for GREEN adolescents! They are generally eager to please, do not like having consequences imposed, and avoid imposition of consequences through behavior rather than subversion (such as lying to their adults when they realize they're in trouble with them). They are more likely to be upfront and honest than higher colors are, and will often admit to their own mistakes, even when they know there will be consequences for doing so.

Most adults would consider a GREEN adolescent the type of child you can be proud of. They work hard, they usually choose to do the right thing, and when they make a mistake, they own it. They respond well to gentle discipline and build strong, pleasant relationships with the adults who take care of them. Grownups caring for GREEN adolescents don't have to worry about their adolescents damaging their relationships through their misbehavior and can trust their adolescents, too! More often than not, however frustrated they may be with consequences or punishment at the time, GREEN adolescents grow to appreciate the people caring for them.

Yellow Adolescents - Low Disciplinary Needs

The first thing you should know about YELLOW adolescents is that they often appear more mature than other colors because they are more communicative and better with their words. More often than not, they succeed in explaining the motivations for their behavior and are adept at discussing not only the behavior itself, but the consequences that come with it. This makes them good negotiators, which may frustrate some adults, especially those of higher colors, as they will try to negotiate their way out of punishment. On the other hand, their understanding, maturity, and skill in reasoning sometimes makes YELLOW adolescents choose spanking over alternative punishments because they would rather have the punishment over quickly than be grounded for a week or more. Some adults might see them as a bit cheeky!

They thrive on a mixture of punishments and do best with adults who can be firm in their decisions, not permitting the YELLOW adolescent to manipulate them into changing the consequences they have selected. It is sometimes, but not always, appropriate to give a YELLOW adolescent a firm spanking, but it is most effective when paired with age-appropriate gentle punishment like grounding. While more juvenile punishments like corner time or time out can be effective, they won't work for all YELLOW adolescents because this can contribute to pent-up emotions and frustration. The good news is that it's not difficult to "finish" a YELLOW adolescent's spanking. It doesn't take much to get them where they need to go emotionally, and hand-spankings generally do the trick!

More often than not, YELLOW adolescents are well-behaved, eager to please, and respectful. Even when they challenge adults, they rare do so in a disrespectful way. Some adults will find YELLOW adolescents thought-provoking. They range from silly to serious, but most YELLOW adolescents will make grownups think twice about the way they handle their behavior in the future. Most types of consequences are successful with YELLOW adolescents, though, and adults can rest assured that they are unlikely to repeat the same behavior again in the future.

Mid Colors

For Adolescents, the term "mid colors" indicates that these adolescents require regular, infrequent discipline. They are "regular kids," neither especially well-behaved nor especially naughty. Once they know where the boundaries are, they will push them from time to time, but they they are more likely to get swept up in the moment than they are to defy their grownups. Most of the time they want to please, but peer pressure and spur of the moment decisions get them into trouble from time to time. Occasional defiance is to be expected with any teenager, however, and it should be noted that Mid Color adolescents don't try as hard as their Low Color peers to avoid trouble. Sometimes the thrill of the opportunity is much bigger than the fear of reprisal.

Another thing to think about with Mid Color Adolescents is that they respond well to corporal punishment because it takes them on an emotional journey. More than the Low Colors, Mid Color Adolescents and Children need to have that journey completed in order for the punishment to be truly effective. For this reason, we do not advise adding a grounding or other "gentle" form of punishment after corporal punishment. You should think about corporal punishment at the end of the term of grounding, even if you administered a spanking at the beginning of the term to complete the emotional process and clear the air with them. Otherwise, you risk leaving them confused, upset, angry, and misbehaving.

Orange Adolescents - Moderate Disciplinary Needs

The first thing you should know about ORANGE adolescents is that they work pretty hard to avoid trouble, not in the sense that they avoid getting caught, but in the sense that they try to do the right thing, but sometimes get too tied up in something their friends are doing that they forget what the rules are. They don't weigh out the cost to reward ratio of breaking a rule, but they do seem to have an internal system that is primed to decide whether staying out another hour past curfew with their friends is worth whatever the punishment is they're going to get at home. By the time it really sinks in that they've broken the rule, they're already caught, because they aren't really thinking about what might happen if they make a choice that just happens to cross a boundary their adults set for them. Getting in trouble always seems to come with an "oh shit" moment for ORANGE adolescents!

Once they know they're in trouble, it's not so much a matter of "if they get caught," because many ORANGE adolescents will tell on themselves if only so they can get their slate wiped clean and move on with their life without having to feel bad about whatever they did that they weren't supposed to do. It's almost comical to some adults the way that an ORANGE adolescents can be willing to approach them and say "hey, I messed up, and I don't want to feel guilty, so please punish me." This does mean that ORANGE adolescents often do best with mild to moderate corporal punishment, but it also presents a challenge that adults face with many Mid Color adolescents: Punishment has to be compassionate and understanding enough to alleviate the guilt the adolescent feels but it also has to be firm enough to dissuade the adolescent from doing the same thing the next time the opportunity arises. For this reason, ORANGE adolescents do best with painful consequences that push them past what they believe are their limits. Adults are advised not to stop because the ORANGE adolescent appears to be purged, but only when they are convinced of full remorse. They do best, therefore, with Orange, Red, or sometimes Violet adults. Low Color adults will struggle to understand and discipline ORANGE adolescents.

ORANGE adolescents don't want to make mistakes or cross boundaries, and so they are generally well behaved and respectful toward adults. They may experience moments of sassy behavior and occasionally resist their adults, but these are often fleeting moments and are usually associated with times they feel as though they are being treated unfairly. Sometimes, they may even be right.

Red Adolescents - High Disciplinary Needs

The first thing you should know about RED adolescents is that they may become frustrated when corporal punishment is not part of their regular disciplinary regimen. It doesn't need to be maintenance spanking, of course, but if a RED adolescent is permitted to behave poorly without consequences, or without consequences that include some form of stiff corporal punishment, their behavior is likely to deteriorate rather than improve. While most RED adolescents aren't conscious of this thought process, it is almost universal for their color. For many, the absence of corporal punishment equates to a lack of love and affection. Some might consider their wires to be twisted, but for the culture of the island, it's not necessarily wrong, either. This means that many RED adolescents aren't especially well-behaved, and if they've gone too long without at least a good spanking, they are likely to act out just to find out where the lines are. It is then up to their adults to rein them back in -- with a good hiding!

You should not mistake this for them wanting to be punished. The distinction is important but difficult for some people to understand. They require firm boundaries, explicit rules, and enforcement of those rules to feel safe. There is a difference between feeling a sense of safety as a result of corporal punishment and wanting to be punished! In addition, like ORANGE adolescents, RED adolescents can get "stuck" emotions when those emotions aren't dealt with appropriately by the adult in charge of them. Therefore, a spanking has to be "finished" by ensuring that the RED adolescent has moved through their guilt into remorse so that the punishment can come to a successful end that doesn't leave them frustrated. They also match well with adults of their own color because they don't do well when grounded or facing long-term restrictions, and that frustration can lead to further misbehavior. Gentle punishments are generally not advised for RED adolescents.

RED adolescents flirt with the line of the boundaries. Sometimes they cross over them intentionally just to see what happens and other times they'll dance close to it because they know it irritates the adults. They aren't as respectful as lower color adolescents usually are, and they are known for their backtalk and their sassy behavior when they are frustrated -- which is often. Adults of lower colors often struggle with RED adolescents because they don't understand them and they often believe they are "bad kids." Many RED adolescents take this personally, and adults are reminded that for all of their flaws, these young people are just kids who need somebody to love them the way they need to be loved. Therefore, punishment for RED adolescents should be as frequent as necessary to keep them emotionally aligned with themselves, and "in line" in terms of their behavior.

You should also note that RED adolescents often need a lot of reassurance following punishment and that leaving them to sit in their emotions following punishment can be counterproductive to having punished them in the first place. They need to be able to process. For some, that means being alone, for others, it means connection. Please know which your RED adolescent is before you decide how to handle the post-punishment period!

Red Adolescent Scenario - Alex, 14

Alex has been told several times not to interrupt adults with sarcastic comments during family meals. One evening, after being corrected for speaking with food in his mouth, Alex rolls his eyes and mutters, "Maybe if dinner wasn't so boring, I'd have something better to do."

The orange adult administers a firm spanking with a hairbrush for the disrespectful comment immediately after the meal. Once the spanking is over, Alex is required to write twenty-five lines: "I will speak respectfully to the adults in my family." The combination of corporal punishment and writing lines is intended to address both the disrespect and the deliberate testing of boundaries.

When the spanking is over, Alex is shaken and the last thing he wants is to sit down and write lines. He attempts to immediately reconnect with the adult, but the adult points him to the table and the lines he's meant to be writing. It takes him more than an hour to write them all out by hand because the spanking left him tearful and needing reassurance that he doesn't get from the adult. When the lines are finished, he leaves the notepad on the table with the pen he used to write them and goes up to his room alone to process.

The red adult administers a paddling immediately after the disrespectful comment is addressed. Once the paddling is complete, the matter is considered settled. Alex is expected to apologize sincerely and speak respectfully in the future, but no additional grounding, writing assignment, or prolonged consequence is imposed.

Alex has a hard time sitting at the table and eating after the paddling, and he struggles to get his food down. The paddling left him tearful and he doesn't like having it so public, and having everybody seeing him so upset, but he apologizes as he was told to do and is quiet until the meal is over. Then he asks if he can go to his room and waits for an affirmative. The adult gives him a few minutes alone and then follows him up to his room to check on him. Alex is grateful for the reconnection and apologizes again for being rude to everybody. He says he doesn't know why he behaves this way.

The violet adult responds swiftly, administering a paddling with little delay after confirming what was said. Once the punishment is complete, Alex is expected to apologize to everyone present at the table before rejoining the family. No additional punishment is imposed, and the adult later spends time reconnecting with Alex to ensure the relationship is fully restored.

Alex is confused by the instruction to apologize before rejoining the family, and at first he hesitates to offer an apology. He's tearful and upset because of the paddling and embarrassed at being punished in front of everyone. His hesitation is not defiance but confusion about what's expected of him, and he needs to be told explicitly what the adult wants. Once he's sure, he offers a tearful apology and then asks if he can go to his room and skip dinner. The adult allows this and brings his dinner up to him later, once he's a bit calmer and ready to talk about what happened.

High Colors

For Adolescents, the term "mid colors" refers to adolescents who do not respond well to mild punishments and who may even resent adults who administer mild consequences for their behavior. While it is certainly important that mid color adolescents go through the entire emotional journey during their punishment in order to feel completed, without the complete emotional journey high color adolescents are likely to feel neglected, rejected, and even more out of control than they did before the punishment. In short, "going too easy" on a high-color adolescent can make behavior worse rather than better, and it will likely frustrate the player, who often won't know what's wrong, just that something doesn't quite feel right to them.

It's also important to consider that High Color adolescents will likely do best when consistently cared for by High Color adults. Low Color adults needn't avoid them, but they should refer these adolescents to higher-colored individuals whoa re more able to take care of their needs in terms of discipline. While they can benefit from a range of adult colors caring for them in an institutional environment, we hope you'll consider only allowing your High Color adolescents to be adopted by High Color adults!

Furthermore, High Color adolescents are most likely to start out at the Orphan Village or St. Jude's academy, rather than as the biological children of adults on the island. This is because their behavior reflects a trauma response that is most common in children who have been abused, neglected, or abandoned.

Violet Adolescents - Very High Disciplinary Needs

The first thing you should know about VIOLET adolescents is that they are tough. Most of the time this is due to their having grown up with tough circumstances (which means that most VIOLET adolescents will start out at the Orphan Village or St. Jude's Academy in the hopes of being adopted rather than as the biological children of one of our island families). They tend to default to a trauma response of fight, although the other responses (flight, freeze, and fawn) are also common. Adults sometimes interpret them as taking rules as a personal attack and then launching a counter attack to prove that the rules don't apply to them. When poorly matched with adults of lower colors, VIOLET adolescents can make discipline a real struggle because not only will they fight punishment, but they will do everything they can to prove that punishment doesn't work for them. It's not entirely incorrect, either: Weak punishment only stirs up the spirited nature of a VIOLET adolescent and makes them fight that much harder. Therefore, it's important that they be will matched with High Color adults.

To put it bluntly, VIOLET adolescents will push the limits of most adults who don't specialize and know how to handle them. They aren't ordinarily violent or aggressive by nature, but they will attempt to walk away from weak correction (or even strong correction) and may ignore mild punishments like grounding. They tend to push adults to their outer limits and then push some more, so they need adults who won't back down and who are willing to fight for them. This may be challenging, because adults need to prove themselves to VIOLET adolescents before they earn their respect, and VIOLET adolescents won't often show respect for adults who haven't earned it from them. The biggest thing an adult can do to earn it is to show that they will consistently show up for their VIOLET adolescent, whether that means enforcing the rules or it means sticking up for them when they've been treated poorly or unfairly. One thing a VIOLET adolescent really respects is an apology when it's owed. You might have to fight to get them to apologize, but they are quick to accept a sincere apology when it's owed to them!

While it's easy to see VIOLET adolescents as tough kids who don't show a lot of emotion, the truth is that they have a lot of inner turmoil. They desperately want to be loved, but they do everything they can to make themselves unlovable because they are proving a pattern that they believe has proven itself to them time and again. By showing adults that they aren't lovable, they keep themselves safe from future heartbreak. This is what makes them so hard to get through to. It's also what makes getting through to them worth it in the long run. Once their trust is earned, you'll have someone who is devoted to you, even if they continue to make a lot of mistakes. Earned trust often translates to earned respect, and even if they still get into a lot of trouble, a respectful VIOLET adolescents is worth the trouble you took to get there. They can make amazing young people to work with!

Indigo Adolescents - Extremely High Disciplinary Needs

The first thing you should know about INDIGO adolescents is that their outer world is a reflection of their inner world. Their behavior is out of control because they feel out of control. They constantly test boundaries because they need to know that there are limits to what they are and are not allowed to do. Often, they aren't in control of their own behavior, and their own behavior frightens them. Therefore, the difference between a INDIGO adolescent and a MAGENTA adolescent is that the former is often doing their best and doesn't want to act out or be violent, but literally can't help themselves, while the latter is aware of their behavior and chooses not to stop when they could. In both cases, aggressive behavior is something like an addiction, but the INDIGO adolescent is in active addiction and can't control their behavior while the MAGENTA adolescent is in recovery and is aware of the choice they are making.

It is, therefore, extremely important to understand that INDIGO adolescents need firm boundaries, strong discipline (often, but not always, in the form of corporal punishment) and a lot of affection, regrouping, talking, and most of all therapy to help them figure out why they feel compelled to behave the way they do and why it's so hard for them to stop. Like most adolescents, they are incredibly emotional and want to feel understood, so they will always thrive best with adults who demonstrate to them that they understand their needs. A willingness to talk about what happened once the punishment is over is crucial if you want to get through to an INDIGO adolescent without breaking their spirit.

Understand that the INDIGO adolescent doesn't want to make trouble, but it is a natural side-effect of their feelings of being out of control. They push boundaries compulsively rather than impulsively and it may even frustrate the adolescent themselves that they are creating friction and tension with the adults who care for them. On the other hand, they struggle to believe that adults can possibly care for them, often due to their past trauma. Adults need to provide careful and considerate reassurance, praise, and comfort alongside strict and often harsh discipline in order to regain control with an INDIGO adolescent.

Magenta Adolescents - Out of Control Behavior

The first thing you should know about MAGENTA adolescents is that they are seriously out of control, violent, and intentionally willful. Many have attachment issues and struggle to connect with other people. Some people might consider these traits to be personality flaws, while others might consider them to be personality disorders. Birchwood Isle's solution to this behavior is more discipline, but it is not, by itself, the whole solution. MAGENTA adolescents desperately need intensive therapy as well as punishment, and while there are no restrictions on who is allowed to play a MAGENTA adolescent, we want to encourage you to think twice before introducing one, especially as your first or second character on this site. Their behavior is often truly and knowingly violent, not because they don't feel like they are in control of their own behavior, but because nobody else has ever been consistent with them. In general, we insist that MAGENTA adolescents belong to the Orphan Village or St. Jude's academy unless there are remarkable circumstances within a biological family.

MAGENTA adolescents act as though consequences don't bother them. Unless the adults handling them are willing to go the full and extreme distance with them, they will laugh in the face of punishment. They need forceful physical or corporal punishment (for the difference, please see our Terms to Know file) or rigid and strict enforcement of "gentle" forms of punishment such as grounding. "Tethering" to an adult might work better, although the adult has to be prepared for willful and defiant behavior that may include violent attempts to break free of the tether. Note that even a very hard thrashing may require additional follow up for a MAGENTA adolescent, who naturally excels at pretending that it doesn't hurt and didn't bother them (even though it definitely did).

It's tempting to think of MAGENTA adolescents as "bad kids," but they aren't. Most of the time they are desperate for somebody to prove to them that they are worth caring for, both in the form of often extreme corporal punishment, but also in the form of loving affection, comfort, and reassurance when they need it. It might be "hard to huge a porcupine" but MAGENTA adolescents desperately need someone who is willing to hold on even when they are fighting the embrace and spitting obscenities. They need extreme connection, and often that connection starts by breaking down walls using harsh corporal or physical punishment. For these kids, it works!

[BWI Admin]

Child Member Groups

The following is a more comprehensive guide to the color coding for child characters. We have gone to great lengths to provide details and specifics for each color group and we hope that you'll find these descriptions useful in selecting your child character's color code. If you have any questions or concerns, please feel free to take out a ticket on Discord to discuss your options with us. We're happy to help you!

Note that this file contains several terms that will be easier to understand once you have read Terms to Know.

We recommend that all players with adult characters also read this file so they know how to handle each child color!

Low Colors

For Children, the term "low colors" indicates that these adolescents do not require frequent discipline. They are generally well-behaved, are more comfortable following rules, and do not present a significant challenge to the adults who care for them. They learn well from natural consequences and when adult intervention is necessary, they respond to logical consequences and gentle punishments without the need for harsh correction. Most of the time they do not require corporal punishment to adjust their behavior, and most low color children don't expect it, so when it happens, it will come as an unpleasant surprise.

Blue Children - Extremely Low Disciplinary Needs

BLUE children represent a group of children between the ages of 3-11 who have especially high needs with remarkably low disciplinary needs. They tend to need a lot of attention from adults, often require intimate care such as bathing and diaper changes, and their players are not interested in engaging with punishment as part of their roleplay (and particularly reject corporal punishment in their play). You may want to consider carefully the difference between a BLUE child and a BLUE adolescent in that BLUE children will need more supervision and adults caring for them need to ensure that their adult has a clear policy regarding preventative measures. As the person posting for your inner kid, you need to understand that some BLUE adults won't stop a child from putting their hand on a hot stove, thus allowing them to experience the natural consequences of having done so. For that reason, you may feel safer placing your inner kid with a GREEN adult caregiver.

Unlike other age ranges of their color, BLUE children may be deeply and negatively affected by natural consequences. Their color represents their low disciplinary needs, high need for attention and intimate care, and their big's preference not to have punitive consequences incorporated into their day to day lives. It does not, however, represent their ability to understand or accept natural consequences. Players choosing this color for their inner child should be mindful of the need to communicate with adult players to ensure that their child's needs are met and that the natural consequences of breaking rules or disobeying their grownups won't potentially harm them. Adult players are asked to be mindful of the age of the inner kid and to not expect a three year old to carry on with their day after burning their hand on a hot stove, for example.

You should consider that BLUE children are ordinary children and that the age range for "children" is quite vast. An 11-year-old may be eager to please and follow rules strictly to the letter while a 3-year-old is still just a toddler learning about the world around them. As with all children on this site, the range is enormous and players should be conscious of the fact that, especially in this age group, the color you give your child says more about your tolerance for how they will be treated than it does about their specific needs.

Green Children - Very Low Disciplinary Needs

GREEN children are more independent and inquisitive than BLUE children. They are generally well-behaved and respond well to gentle discipline and logical consequences. In most cases, players with GREEN children are not looking for intimate care like diapering or bathing (at least on-screen), and these children are more likely to pursue active, individual activities than requiring constant attention from their caregivers. They are generally quick to obey and eager to please, but may become resentful of too much oversight or "helicopter parenting." Gentle punishments are effective for GREEN children because they are so independent and dislike their time being restricted as much as they do.

In most cases, adults should take into consideration that GREEN children are played by members who do not want corporal punishment incorporated into their play style, and therefore should stick closely to natural and logical consequences, as well as gentle punishments when it is deemed appropriate to employ them. If you are considering creating a GREEN child, please note that your child's color tells adult players to stop before administering any corporal punishment and that the burden of communication is higher with low colors than it is with mid colors or high colors. That's okay! Don't let that stop you from making a GREEN child. Just understand that you will best match with BLUE and GREEN adults.

You should consider that GREEN children are ordinary children and that the age range for "children" is quite vast. An 11-year-old may be eager to please and follow rules strictly to the letter while a 3-year-old is still just a toddler learning about the world around them. As with all children on this site, the range is enormous and players should be conscious of the fact that, especially in this age group, the color you give your child says more about your tolerance for how they will be treated than it does about their specific needs.

Yellow Children - Low Disciplinary Needs

YELLOW children are generally well behaved. Their misbehavior is often a result of being distracted rather than being defiant. They might neglect to do a chore because they are too engrossed in something else, or they might stop an activity halfway through it to pursue another interest. When discipline becomes necessary for YELLOW children, it is often because they need their attention drawn back to the task at hand -- or obedience. They need regular reminders of the expectations their adults have set for them, and are prone to forgetting rules. Corporal punishment in the form of (generally mild) hand spankings are useful for YELLOW children because the short, sharp shock of a smack to the seat returns their attention to what they were supposed to be doing. Most adults find this useful, and adults who do not use corporal punishment may be frustrated by a YELLOW child's lack of attention span.

Members choosing to play a YELLOW child do so accepting that age-appropriate corporal punishment has its place in parenting their inner kid, while also electing to avoid stiffer sanctions such as paddling. In some cases, they don't want spanking as part of their roleplay, but acknowledge that it is useful or even necessary for their inner kid. In other cases, they want it, but they don't want it to dominate every thread. In still other cases, they are new to spanking in their roleplay and want to avoid getting in over their heads, so they're starting with something they feel is manageable. All of these are good reasons for a member to create a YELLOW child.

Note that YELLOW children are generally tolerant of corporal punishment up to a point, and most in this color category tend to be "springy," in that they are capable of hopping right up after a spanking and going back to their previous play. This doesn't mean that they don't need reassurance, but they are generally less clingy than other Low Color children, and they won't demand hours of reconnection once they've been punished. For most YELLOW children, they want to move on as quickly as possible and forget that it ever happened. The exception may be if they are punished in front of their friends, as this is very embarrassing, especially for children over about 7 years old.

Mid Colors

For Children, the term "mid colors" indicates that these children require regular, infrequent discipline. They are "regular kids," neither especially well-behaved nor especially naughty. Once they know where the boundaries are, they will push them from time to time, but they are more likely to get swept up in the moment than they are to defy their grownups. Most of the time they want to please, but peer pressure and spur of the moment decisions get them into trouble from time to time. Occasional defiance is to be expected with any teenager, however, and it should be noted that Mid Color Children don't try as hard as their Low Color peers to avoid trouble. Sometimes the thrill of the opportunity is much bigger than the fear of reprisal.

Another thing to think about with Mid Color Children is that they respond well to corporal punishment because it takes them on an emotional journey. More than any other color grouping, Mid Color Children and Adolescents need to have that journey completed in order for the punishment to be truly effective. For this reason, we do not advise adding a grounding or other "gentle" form of punishment after corporal punishment. You should think about corporal punishment at the end of the term of grounding, even if you administered a spanking at the beginning of the term to complete the emotional process and clear the air with them. Otherwise, you risk leaving them confused, upset, angry, and misbehaving.

Orange Children - Moderate Disciplinary Needs

ORANGE children try so hard to avoid trouble, but it just seems to be able to find them too easily! like most YELLOW children, trouble often happens because they are distracted by something more exciting than following the rules and they simply get swept up in the action. As with adolescents, peer pressure may also come into play, and it can sometimes seem as though whatever it is they'd rather be doing is worth the potential trouble they could get into for doing it. Trouble, for ORANGE children, often feels like a hypothetical that exists in some far off, remote place that exists outside the here and now. It's not something for them to worry about because it doesn't exist on the same timeline they do!

The good news for their adults is that ORANGE children tend to be honest. When they've done something they weren't supposed to do, they are often quick to confess to their mistakes. Some may even admit to their misbehavior before they've been caught because once the moment in which they were living has ended, they tend to feel bad for the things they did that should have gotten them in trouble, and many ORANGE children are smart enough and wise enough not to want whatever it was they did to break the rules hanging over their heads. For that reason alone they are more likely than other colors to confess to having done something they weren't supposed to do. This often means that whatever their consequences are wind up being milder because they chose to be honest about their behavior, and adults usually appreciate that!

Like their adolescent counterparts, it is often important that an ORANGE child's punishment be completely finished and that it takes them on the complete emotional journey before it ends. If the emotional journey isn't complete, and if they aren't punished thoroughly, they are more likely to cling to adults and become annoying. On the opposite side of this is ORANGE children who misbehave due to the frustration of not feeling as though the air has been cleared. You may also want to note that for ORANGE children, long-lasting consequences can be extremely upsetting. Therefore, if you're dealing with an older ORANGE child, you're better off assigning whatever long-term consequences before the spanking with the spanking at the end -- or finishing off a lengthy grounding with another spanking.

Red Children - High Disciplinary Needs

RED children regularly test limits and boundaries -- and their adults' patience! When they see a line, they are inclined to cross it -- or at least to approach it at full speed and then grind to a sudden halt before they do cross it. They definitely keep the adults in their lives on their toes! The hard part about this is that RED children don't always know when they are crossing into dangerous territory. Because many children are still so young, they don't always understand behaviors that relate to safety, and among the low and mid colors, they are the most likely to do something that puts themselves at risk in spite of repeated warnings from their adults. Therefore, they are the most likely to ignore warnings that say "don't cross this boundary" and walk right past it into something that is potentially truly dangerous -- like trying to play alone at the swimming hole, or wandering off alone at the Pedestrian Mall. Adults really need to keep an eye on RED children!

Another important thing to know is that RED children don't often respond well to gentle punishments. For children living at the Orphan Village, this often stems from a lack of trust in adult follow-through. If the adult puts them in time out, will that adult remember in two minutes when they get up and carry on with their play? If they're grounded, will the adult forget halfway through the grounding term and allow them to watch television with the family? Or succumb because they say it's "not fair?" The great thing about corporal punishment for RED children is that the punishment is over and done with and there is no question in the child's mind about whether or not it will be completed because it already has been. One of the reasons that RED children test so much is because they need the security of that follow-through, and corporal punishment, at least where inner kids are concerned, is a perfect way to ensure the follow through actually happens!

On the other hand, adults should be aware that RED children will do everything they can to talk their way out of consequences they have rightfully earned, including arguing that the punishment is unjust even when they clearly crossed the line that the adult laid out for them. Adults will need to be especially firm in their enforcement of the rules with RED children because, like ORANGE children (and every high color child as well), they need to complete the emotional journey in order for the punishment to be effective. Without this completion, the RED child will just get right into more trouble almost immediately -- the same day or the following day, most likely.

High Colors

For Children, the term "high colors" refers to children who need regular, consistent, harsh discipline to feel safe. Without it, they will drift emotionally, and this drifting not only results in worsening behavior on their part, but a deep sense of insecurity. In many cases this is due to the fact that they are accustomed to being struck by the parents from whom they were removed in the first place, but it may also be due to a trauma response. Because High Color adults have the best toolbox for helping High Color children, it is recommended that (outside of the Orphan Village), players with High Color children look for High Color adults to adopt them.

In addition, Low Color adults are encouraged to seek Mid or High Color adults to discipline High Color children living in the Orphan Village, as Low Color punishments may only serve to frustrate these children and their players. While the risk of in-character poor behavior may be part of the point on Birchwood Isle, we do not aim to frustrate our members, and we prefer to ensure that everyone's needs are met. Try not to jump in with a High Color child as a Low Color adult unless there is absolutely no other option to deal with poor behavior on their part!

Violet Children - Very High Disciplinary Needs

VIOLET children are challenging for most adults to deal with. They are often defiant, disorderly, and disruptive. They are incredibly strong-willed and want to have things done their way even when their way doesn't work for other people who are living with them and caring for them. They frequently challenge authority and talk back (where age-appropriate). Most adults find them exasperating, and it's easy to give up and stop trying with VIOLET children because often the exhaustion of caring for them outweighs the reward, or the reward appears to arrive too late. Like their adolescent counterparts, VIOLET children appear to be tough because they will battle it out with adults who attempt to discipline them instead of submitting to punishment. For this reason, it is generally important that VIOLET children be matched with high-color adults who are able to withstand the pressure of caring for them.

In general, VIOLET children will try to avoid punishment by walking away from it. For them, attempts at gentle punishment often appear to be weakness on the part of the adult, and they will exploit that weakness, often by getting up from time out repeatedly, or simply doing what they want when a grounding has been imposed. This is because they have often found that this strategy works to "cancel" whatever the punishment was and that most adults don't continue to try as time goes on. They look to control situations that are outside of their control by controlling the people in those situations. For most VIOLET children, this is because they have already been abandoned, and therefore most of them will start out in the Orphan Village. Adults should bear in mind that this is often a response to extreme trauma and not merely an attempt to misbehave. Everything in a VIOLET child's life feels out of control so they are attempting to regain control in any way they can.

As with mid-color children, it's important to ensure that VIOLET children go through the entire emotional journey of punishment. This especially means that after care can be important, but also that it has to be tailored to the child. At the top of the list is making sure that when the punishment is over, the VIOLET child is no longer angry with the one who gave it. Even if the child wants to pull away (and they should be allowed, if this is the case), the responsible adult will ensure that they have been adequately reconnected and will aim for attachment, since so many VIOLET and INDIGO children struggle with attachment. Gentle punishments leave many high-color children feeling unfinished, so if they are to be used, they should be used in combination with corporal punishment. Physical punishment (see the Terms to Know file) may also be useful, but only in combination with other punishments, and sparingly with children.

Indigo Children - Extremely High Disciplinary Needs

INDIGO children are extremely uncooperative. They are almost impossible for low or mid-color adults to discipline, challenge even high-color adults, and often get overwhelmed by their own big feelings. Their inner emotional world has already spiraled out of control, they lack trust in the adults around them, and they most often feel that the world has rejected them. Like VIOLET children, they almost always start out as residents of the Orphan Village in the hopes of being adopted by someone who can understand them. While the reasons for being in the Orphan Village vary from one child to the next, one thing is for certain: Someone, at some point, has abandoned them, whether through abusive or neglectful behavior or death. And in the majority of cases, these children also feel abandoned by previous foster parents and social workers, as well. Their frustration is reasonable, but their behavior is wildly out of control -- even violent.

It may, therefore, take specialized adults to be able to handle INDIGO children, which is why we recommend that only high-color adults take on the task of parenting them. Note that we expect all adults working in the homes in the Orphan Village to help care for all children living there, regardless of their color, but we also anticipate that discipline is best handled by high-colors who understand their specific high needs. For example, a low color adult attempting to discipline an INDIGO child is likely to cause more frustration than behavior modification, resulting in the need for punishment to be applied multiple times. While this may work in some ways and for some players, we remind our members to treat these children as real to their bigs, which means that while the internal logic of Birchwood Isle permits particularly severe punishment, we aim not to harm inner children within the framework of that logic.

You are also reminded that we expect adult players to acknowledge that children and adolescents of every color and color level are emotional beings and that their emotional needs must be met at the same time as their disciplinary needs. Violet and Indigo adults may be especially harsh, but they still tend to the emotional needs of the children they care for. INDIGO children may not appear to be as emotional as some other colors, but that doesn't mean that they don't require some form of aftercare (often whatever is most suited to the adult who has disciplined them). Most of the time an adult is going to continue punishment until they get the desired reaction (often tears and/or remorse) from the child regardless of their color. The adult's job, afterward, is to ensure that the INDIGO child leaves the punishment knowing they are cared for and worthy of being loved. This is especially important for INDIGO children because they often question whether or not they are lovable, which is often what results in their difficult behavior.

Magenta Children - Out of Control Behavior

MAGENTA children are those you might generally classify as "troubled." They often have attachment issues, struggle with obedience, and are labeled "oppositional" or "defiant" by the adults caring for them. In terms of adoptive placements, they are the most difficult children to place because they are so disruptive to the family setting, and they may also struggle in the Orphan Village. (The admins are open to all different kinds of children, but it cannot be over-emphasized how difficult you may find placing a MAGENTA child to be. We do not recommend making a MAGENTA child for your first or even second inner kid. Consider children of lower colors first, then work your way up to MAGENTA children. We'll let you know if we think your child qualifies for this color -- they can probably survive as an INDIGO child after all!)

Like their adolescent counterparts, MAGENTA children are intentionally difficult. While it may not always be consciously difficult, they aim to make things tough for their caregivers because they fear attachment. People in their lives have abandoned them before and because they do not want to be abandoned again, they push the adults caring for them away -- hard. This may also manifest itself as violence against other children who seem to be getting close to "their" adults, and they can be very possessive over the adults they consider themselves to be the most attached to. Because of their odd attachment style, they may also attach most to the adults who are hardest on them. Therefore, any adult who consistently deals with the same MAGENTA child repeatedly must consider that this child is likely to become attached to them and that they may need to consider following through to support everyone involved. For this reason, we advise adults to trade off working with MAGENTA children whenever possible.

Beneath it all, MAGENTA children are looking for the same things that any other child is, and that is love, affection, and belonging. If you can get through to a MAGENTA child, they will make it worth it for you, often by changing their color to INDIGO or even VIOLET. We will never force (or even necessarily encourage) someone to take on a child they don't feel prepared to parent, but we will stress that choosing to parent a MAGENTA child can be an incredibly rewarding experience because the potential for growth and change is immense here! (One would benefit from noting that, while adolescents of the same color are difficult, they are not as challenging to navigate as children.)